Saturday, 29 August 2015

If You Do Any Of These Marriage Is Not For You

A happy marriage is not like football match, you don't go into it with the intention of winning all the time. Having observed how marriages crumble in these days I’ve recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn’t for everybody. If you have some certain characters in you, then marriage may not be for you.

One thing everyone should ponder about is why marriages don't last any longer. Is it that people have too much expectation about what marriage is all about? or just a mere assumption that when you got married, you will be happy?

Marriage is not for you if you do any or all of the following
1) You Expect To Always Be Happy Once You Marry Him: The greatest mistake any prospective couple could make is expecting to be happy after marriage.You don’t marry only to be happy, you marry to make someone else happy. Your marriage is not actually for yourself, you’re getting married for a family.

Not only for the in-laws and all the your hubby's relatives, but for your unborn children as well. Now to make all these people happy and be pleased with you, then you have to make sacrifice, you have to give up somethings you like doing most just to make them happy. 

A true marriage is never about you. It’s about the person you love; their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams must be supported by you.

So if you are the type that is going into marriage because of yourself alone, am sorry, marriage is not for you.

2) Me and My Spouse Alone Attitude:  Do you ever think of  getting married exclusively to your husband or wife alone without welcoming any other person? Be it your in-laws, his/her friends or any body? Married is not only for you, your husband or children alone, its for everybody around the union.

You don't have to put your spouse in a situation where he or she has to choose between you and a relative. If you do so, you're putting your spouse in a nearly impossible bind.

Instead, try to understand the bond your spouse has with his or her grandparents, parents, and siblings. If possible, try to support that relationship. Even if your spouse has parents from poor background, you can't force him/her against them.
  
3) Always with selfish demand: For you to have an everlasting marriage, you have to show your love selflessly. If you are going into marriage, kindly go with the intention of what can I give?”. How can I help?

Selfishness in marriage will hinder you from truly becoming one with your spouse. Selfishness means to care for yourself, getting as much as you want, and giving as little as you can. It’s all about you!

The real thing is, that when you are still single and unmarried you only have one person to think about, yourself. 

You had to think about what you wanted to eat, wear, what music to listen to, how to spend your money all alone, but the moment you get married, this have to change.

If you don't want to change from been selfish, then marriage is not for you.

11 comments:

  1. But sometimea avoid uour relatives from coming is healthy just to avoid problems in your home

    Glowyshoe blog

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    Replies
    1. Yea! But not to completely decide that nobody comes into your home at all. One have to tolerate others especially family and friends

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    2. You're so right Uthman. I have about 3 relatives living with me and hubby and everything is just fine. We just have to learn to tolerate others
      www.alabekee.com

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  2. If you don't see marriage as a very serious business too, then you shouldn't consider it for any reason.
    Just to add a point, since you said Five reasons, but listed Three.

    Cheers!

    Egwumba’s Blog

    ReplyDelete
  3. but me i hisave this me and my husband mentality oo.i dont have time for drama.i like to live in my world alone.i hardly relate with my inlaws to show you how bad it is.

    anyways you write so well,i should contact you one of these days to do a guest post on my blog.

    bolateethole.blogspot.com

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  4. Am glad I found dis blog am going through some ish. Keep up the good work.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much. Am happy you found it useful

      Delete

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