As a married man or woman, looking back at the
time you were preparing for marriage. You will realize that, there are a lot of
ups and down aspects of marriage that you were not told. Have you
ever wondered why marriage becomes completely different from what we thought of
it? Haven gotten married to that special person your heart belongs, yet in a couple
of months or so, you tend to see the other colour of what marriage is all
about.
Just a year and some days ago, one of this blog
readers consulted me for a marriage counseling...and after a brief chat with
the prospective couples, I concluded my advice with by saying “Buy A
Big-Sized Bed.”
It was a surprised me that, they've never heard
such before. This simply passed a message to me that; there are several
important marriage's advice that are left unsaid to many new couples. Yesterday
marks a year after their marriage, and the woman contacted me to appreciate my
advice and to gist me on how her marriage life has been...so far.
Today, with this post, am going to share with you,
the advice I offered them on “what people will never tell you about marriage”.
Below are some of the things you will learn in marriage which no one will
tell you:
1. Marriage Is A Voluntary Way Of Giving Up
Your Freedom: On the wedding day, marriage
is so much fun for so many reasons. Especially when you are allowed to make
your choice.
Its good when you are given the opportunity to select the right
man/woman you wish to live your life with. Unfortunately while things don't work out as we
expected. You can’t just go back to your respective homes because things are
not working as well.
You actually made the decision alone while
you were planning to get a suitor…but now your parents, your friends, your
family and the society are involved. And all of them will suggest that you must
remain in the relationship. Does it really mean you have no freedom to go out
of what you put yourself into? The answer is YES.
2. You Will Surely Have Conflict: Don’t think
because your pre-marital experience didn’t consist of much conflict. Just
expect it. It will definitely come, but what matters is how you manage your
conflict. Your choice of conflict
management can make or break your marriage.
Joining two different people into one body
requires you to look at your differences. Learn to work through those things
with as much selflessness and sacrifice as you can. So that when conflict set
in, you will know how to tackle it a midst yourselves.
3. You Will Get Tired Of Sex: Sex in
marriage plays a major role in marriage. It offers you an intimate experience
with your partner, and it’s often been shared with no other person. But the
reality is that, you will get tired of it – your partner will demand and you
won’t be ready for it.
Despite the fact that, sex takes a little time in
your marriage life compared to the day-in-day-out routine of life that takes up
most of your time. You will surely be busy with office work, your business,
parenting, laundry, cooking, house chores and other engagement that will make
you reject sex.
As importance as to satisfying each other sexually
in marriage, you will deprive your partner. It is a common problem, but before
marriage, nobody will tell you what to do about it. And If not properly managed
it can lead to break up.
4. You Will Be Tired Of Your Marriage Life: Even in the
most blessed and interesting marriages you are praying to have. You will surely
come to a point where you’ve reached the end of yourselves. It will be that
time when you’ve given everything and feel like you’ve got nothing left to
give.
A period after marriage, there will be a period
when you will want to give up; to give up on trying, on forgiving, on healing,
on growing or on loving. You will just feel so tired of the whole thing without
reason.
This moment is what some couples failed to plan
for, and they ended up given up. That’s why today, you can easily hear in the
case of divorce after 28years of marriage.
The essence of this post is to guide you on the important questions you should ask while undergoing a marriage counseling.
Quite informative boss
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DeleteOkay i appreciate this post but still didn't get the big sized bed gist lol.
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DeleteI can relate with Number 3,so true. Hahahahahahah
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hmmm bola ooo..just in one year? and you can relate to that..hahahah
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King Solomon said it all. Vanity upon Vanity ... abi? Nice post saheed.
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Preach on pastor Uthman. Some people think that marriage is a bed of roses until they get into it
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ReplyDeleteHello, very interesting post.
ReplyDeleteThe points you have mentioned are very useful but I wonder how many will heed to these wonderful points before marriage. To be bride and groom live in their specially created heaven and believe in everlasting happiness. They dream of the wonderful life ahead of them without any problems and misunderstanding.
Herein comes your useful advice for the couple to understand the reality of life and be well prepared to meet the challenges of marriage.
Marriage is a bliss provided we know how to tackle the myriad problems that come along the way.
Best wishes
Thanks so much for your wonderful short contribution.
DeleteEven while dating I have experienced 2, 3 and even 4
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