Friday, 12 June 2015

Reasons why relationships become bored

Two days ago in our keep love real whatsapp group forum, a female member asked if it is natural for long term relationship to get bored and become less interesting. At the end of the whole forum discussion with her, she painted out how bored her five years old relationship had become.
Therefore, in this post, I will be highlighting my own little contribution towards getting her problem solved, for the benefits of others who may be faced with such a challenge either now or in the nearest future. has it's perfect way of bringing us a comfort at a start. It makes us feel so comfortable around that special person we've seen to be a perfect match to us. He/she seems to be so wonderful that we don't want to believe we can actually live without them. This is because so much importance has been attached to our togetherness.

Unfortunately, as the relationship grows older and mature, many of us assign less time to spice it up instead we give a high priority to other activities and commitments. This is not because we don't value or respect our relationship any longer but because, unknowingly, we are taking it for granted. In our minds, we just believe the love is still there, but we assume it is unnecessary to continue doing all those old days stuff we did when the relationship just started. This is wrong and it is indeed a big mistake when we assume that our lovers will no longer need that same kind of care, attention and commitment we do give in those earlier days.

I described to her, two scenarios where a relationship can become bored. The first one is in a long term dating relationship while the second is in a marriage life. Here are the scenes.

Long term dating relationship
Often time in life, there are certain conditions which make dating relationship to be prolonged. A very clear and most common among the is when one or the both lovers are not ready to get married any time soon. Since their love is real, there is nothing wrong in keeping such a love alive. Due to human imperfection, after a long period of dating, we no longer put the same efforts as we used to do to keep the relationship real. We only call and see each other once in a while. We no longer believe in some heart connectors, the buying of love cards, flowers and other wonderful love gifts for them are no longer needed.

Unfortunately, this passes a wrong negative impression on them and makes them assume that we don't longer value and needed their companionship as we used to do years back. Thereafter, our relationship becomes so bored and uninteresting to that very person who once thought he/she can't live without us.

Boredom in marriage
After a long period of living together as a couple. Marriage makes us to be very too comfortable with our spouses. With this, we just stop trying to get them impressed any more. We don't talk more about relationship unlike before, when most of our gist is always about our love, outing or travelling experience. Now we seem so busy for that, and if there is anything to discuss with our wives or husbands Now, its always about children's school fees, family wedding or how we gonna move to our new home soon. Unknowingly to us that this, is killing the relationship as it has become bored already.

It is not an option, but compulsory for us to take out of our busy time schedule to bring back our dying long term relationship either in dating or marriage. Trying something new can introduce incitement into that old love we so much value. This emotional feeling is the only chain that connected us together. Giving this time to our relationship will help us in so many ways..-we can early hang out, be together indoor for true lovers discussion or walking out to buy some gifts for each-other. This will not only help to cement our relationship but also provide us with that wonderful emotional feelings worthy of keeping our relationship alive.


  1. Hmmm, am learning everyday, so relationship can be boring??? well it depends on the people in it

  2. Ajibike it get bored when a dating relationship lasted for a very too long period and no new innovation is added to spice it we need to always keep it real.

  3. It's very easy for a relationship to get boring because after the honeymoon phase, everything becomes routine and both partners stop doing what they used to do to get each other's attention before.

    1. yea,,.after honeymoon nothing new comes in again. thanks for adding that Tomi.

  4. The fact is that spices depends on the both couples whether lovers or married...if the both couples plan to work it out by being spontaneous,trust me no matter how long the relationship is,it will still seem brand new


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